Farewell my father

Forever has the pen been the crutch I leaned on, the sword I fought my battles with, today I curse it. I curse the pen that is forced to write these words too soon. The same pen you put in my hands and taught me how to use is now bidding you farewell.

I search for the words to describe my sorrow, to make meaning of the emptiness but I fail. I fail because the words are no longer within me, I search for them and find them all around me flowing from the masses that have come to pay respects to a man they once knew, a man who has at one point touched their lives and helped change them forever.

Through teary eyes I hear stories of the man you were and I realise that it was not only me who has lost a father, an entire nation did. People from all walks of life speaking in different tongues told of your generosity, your patriotism, your wisdom and love for life. Each one of them came holding within a memory, a story, a moment that will live with them forever. For that we are grateful, for it assures us that you are in the hearts of all who knew you and in the minds of those who did not have the chance to.

Throughout my childhood I heard you speak of the importance of Arab unity and witnessed your sleepless nights over its slow deterioration. During our time together you instilled in us a love for this country that shall never falter. You spoke of your time with its founders, explained how the United Arab Emirates was birthed against all odds and insisted on the grave importance of protecting this nation at all costs. You loved this nation until the day your heart gave out and I can only hope you are able to see how much the nation loved you back.

The Arab world mourns your death and feels burdened by your loss for you were one of its greatest fighters and its strongest voices.

You were the patriot who gave his entire being to the foundation and future of this great nation. You were the man who fought to give a generation of women an education. You were the man who penned the truth when our world was surrounded with lies. You were the patriot who wanted nothing more than to see the Arab world united and flourishing.

Amongst all the responsibilities you shouldered and the endless quest to uphold the media ethics you respected, you were ever present as a father. You never failed to notice the slightest grimace on our faces, coming to our aid with your witty sense of humour and warm embrace assuring us that all will be well.

You made sure that you were never absent, our daily conversations and light banter were your most cherished moments. You always said family comes first and we are forever grateful for that.

Your legacy will live on within us and through the work your beloved Dar Al Khaleej will continue to give for years to come. We will carry the torch and run with it to the ends of the earth for there is no better way to show you that our hearts grieve your loss every day but to live by your ethics and shout out your beliefs. Your words of wisdom and advice, your political and media prowess have been instilled in us and with them we shall continue on the road that you have paved.

Farewell my father, my mentor and my best friend. You are never gone for you are in our hearts and the hearts of all who knew you. You are here, heart and soul. Thank you for all that you have given us and all that you continue to give in spirit even after you have gone. 

Rest in peace my father, may you find in heaven your eternal resting place.

This article was published in The Gulf Today on 9th Feb. 2014 http://bit.ly/1o66VDG

And Arabic version was published in Al Khaleej newspaper http://bit.ly/LKuEKk

Feminist before her time

We knew her as a mother of men, a mother to all but back when she was younger she was a girl who would not conform to what she believed was unfair, to what she saw as unjust. She was a girl who possessed the courage to put an end to what was in her eyes, even then, demeaning. It was a time when this country was nothing more than a gathering of tribes. She grew up in it not as we know it today, she lived in a UAE that was tight-knit, sheltered and unexposed. 

It was a time when child marriages were the norm, a place where a sign of a man's wealth was revealed by the number of wives he had, and women’s rights were those that were given to them by men. Even then, she stood tall, resisted an early marriage and refused to be treated like a possession. It was her choice to raise her two boys as a single mother, two boys who grew up to be men who played a pivotal role in shaping the country we know today. 

Everyone has heard of her two sons but not many have heard of the great woman behind these great men.

My grandmother was the first feminist I have ever known. She spoke of a woman's right and the preservation of her pride and dignity at a time when such ideas seemed taboo. She believed that a woman's education was her most prized possession and that her independence is a right not a luxury bestowed upon her. As a child I grew up listening to her stories of the harsh yet innocent times of her youth, of her struggles in raising her boys with the help of only her mother. I heard many times of her heartbreak at sending her boys off to Kuwait to get an education that she could never have. And about the many years she longed to see them at a time when communications were confined to letters that she could not read. 

She was a woman who loved life and the people in it. She recited poetry, loved music and had a sense of humour that remained with her to the very end. She was the woman who taught me that speaking one's mind and standing up for one's rights should be done gracefully and without disrespect for opposing views. She was a mother to all who knew her and to this day fondly call her "Mama Sheikha". 

I know that my words will never do her justice for she was the greatest part of my life. The void she left can never be filled no matter how many words I throw into it. She was my link to a life I never lived but, through her eyes, grew to love.

Loss is the absence of a part of you, you hold dear. In life, death is the absolute loss. We are taught that death is inevitable yet that never makes it any less cruel. Death is always sudden no matter how prepared you are for it. Death is always sudden, death is always cruel. 

My grandmother lost a son eleven years ago, his absence broke her spirit and she was never the same again. Eleven years later and only one week before her son's death anniversary she chose to leave us. And just like in life, in death she left gracefully and quietly. She was by my side since the day I came into this world and when she left it I was by hers.

She was my father's mother, she was my mother, she was and still is the strongest woman I have ever met. 

May she rest in eternal peace knowing that she will forever remain in our hearts.

This article was first published in The Gulf Today newspaper on 12 May, 2013. Arabic version was published in Al Khaleej newspaper http://bit.ly/10P6vT3